I apologies once again for the lack of posts. I have been slacking on this blog and it’s not right. My blog was my starting point into writing, journalism and creating content. Without it, I wouldn’t have got half the experience I would’ve so I owe a lot to this blog..
Which is why I HATE it when this gets put on the back burner, where my other opportunities and my job gets in the way.
However, this nicely leads my into what I want to talk about this post. I want to talk about bread-crumbing.
Bread-crumbing is apparently the buzzword of the year. Haven’t heard of it? Me neither before this. But it’s basically the “new ghosting” in the sense that you’re giving someone false hope, particularly by text messaging, even though there is no real intention. An example of this is when you message someone that ‘you defo should meet up soon!’ but never do. It happens so much in dating, but I think this trend is fast becoming a thing in friendships too.
I know we all live busy lives. Juggling work with friends, relationships to family, it sometimes feels like you never have enough time for anyone. Sometimes you try to plan things but they genuinely don’t work out. That’s okay. But there are some friends, some group chats, where you know you’re not going to meet up, ever, and it’s almost common courtesy to suggest meeting up, just to show you haven’t forgotten about them.
Own up, how many of you actually make the time to go out with friends?
Now, hands up, how many of you send that obligatory message on WhatsApp promising that you’re gonna be free the weekend after next for those overdue drinks that never seem to be a reality? The latter has fast become the more popular situation as we live in a society where we are so glued to our phones that we live in a virtual world, rather that actually conversing with real life people.
I admit, I have friends in my phone who I chat to every now and then, and we’re always saying, “We have to meet up soon, it’s been so long!” but I know I’m not going to.
With things like Social Media, it’s hard to forget about someone. We constantly know what our fiends are doing, their whereabouts, who they’re with etc. Social Media tells us about the people around us without them telling us what they’re up to.
And I think that’s why bread crumbing exists.
If we didn’t have social media, if we wanted to find out who are friends are dating, where they went on holiday, we’d have to meet up to discuss. You know, have a real face-to-face conversation!! Meeting up is no longer ‘just a suggestion’ because suddenly has more value, because you now gain knowledge you wouldn’t otherwise know. Social Media takes away that conversation with your friends, that period where you look forward to seeing each other and telling each other stuff.
Being the breadcrumber means you can drop subtle message every now and then to remind them that you’re somewhat interested still. It could also been seen as a way to get attention when someone who you consider to be more important than the person you are breadcrumbing is busy.
We live in a society where we all hide behind our screens. We communicate with our friends and family through a screen, for example, who likes texting more than speaking on the phone!? We find dates via our screen, we share our life updates via our screen.
All these things show us that the one thing we all, as breadcrumbers, have in common is that we are lazy. They like to remind you they’re still around, or rather, they enjoy the satisfaction knowing that you haven’t forgotten them. They check in, but never convert likes and messages into actions. Working in Marketing and Adversting has taught me conversion are extremely important. At work, there’s no point us putting in all these effort of search and social if no one converts. Similarly, what’s the point in putting in all this effort with people who are never gonna meet?
If you’ve ever been breadcrumbed then you’ll know where I’m coming from and how frustrating it is. If you’re lucky enough to haven’t then you have super nice friends and I hope you never experience it! There’s nothing worse than getting your hopes up high for a failure. It’s horrible to be someone beck and call, to be strung along and played with until you’re ignored for six months before they pipe up again from either a) boredom or b) because they themselves got dumped.
If you wanna read more from me or have a look at my social, you can find me at:
Bright Shiny News ➵ http://www.brightshinynews.com/author/jessicalam
HelloGiggles ➵ http://www.hellogiggles.com/author/jessica-lam
Select Specs Ltd ➵ https://www.selectspecs.com/fashion-lifestyle/author/jessicalam/