Hopeless Romantic.

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I am an incurable romantic. I believe in hope, dreams and decency, love tenderness and kindness. I believe in mankind – Leonard Nimoy

I, as an English student, am a hopeless romantic. I love to read romantic novels, watch the cutest rom-coms and I constantly wish my (love) life will end up just like the fairy tales you hear whilst growing up. My favourite stories consist of real life people meeting when they’re 11/12 years old and end up marrying each other or watching those videos on YouTube where people go to extreme lengths to propose to someone/ask someone out to prom. As sexist as it may seem, I believe a guy should make the first move, flowers do make me happy and a lady should never kiss and tell (within reason of course). I personally love the cliches, the cheesy pick up lines, the sweet gestures. I am a full believer in romance.

In my 20 years, I’ve had my fair share of crushes, boyfriends and those boys we all know are the ‘should’ve/could’ve/would’ve” type of boys. I’ve also witnessed my friends go through happy relationships, the worst breakups ever and those times when the feeling aren’t always reciprocated. Love and relationships are a complicated thing which to this day, I still do not understand.

Lately, my friends and I are having real problems with guys. We spend hours analysing the tiniest details, trying to get a glimpse of the mind of the opposite sex. Yet we have come to a dead end.

You see, I have this one friend who doesn’t know where she stands with Boy A, are they friends or are they more than friends? Friends with benefits?

I have another friend who went on a date with Guy B and although she said it went super well and they’ve been talking all the time, when she approaches the idea of a second date, he always seems to be busy. How convenient.

My problem is that I had Boy C and he was doing all the chasing (which I must admit, I loved), but now I feel like roles reversed – mainly because I’m super thick and only I have the ability to turn a conversation from flirting to friend zone in a matter of seconds which is, and was, never my intention. I just suck at the whole flirting game.

I think with the whole Snapchat/Tinder sort of world we live in, romance has become dead. It gives you a false sense of confidence (#keyboardwarrior). Like how easy is it to approach someone now? And more importantly, how easy is it to hide things from someone else? Like I could ultimately be chatting to you, your brother and your next door neighbour at the same time. Where is the feeling of building up the courage to talk to someone, you know, that butterflies in the stomach feeling? Like I said, I like the idea of old fashioned romance.

I don’t think I’ll ever understand boys. I don’t understand how, for example Boy C is so hot and cold with me, or why Guy B won’t just say if he felt there was chemistry or not instead of leading my poor friend on. Or how Boy A won’t admit his feelings to my confused friend. I know I’m too young to fall in love right now and I have yet to experience one of the greatest feelings in the world, but a bit of fun and romance never hurt anyone, ey? I know life isn’t going to be all sunshine, rainbow and roses, but a girl can dream.

If any of you could please explain to me or give me a handbook on how guys work, that would make my day.

X

PS: this article by Buzzfeed sums up life – http://www.buzzfeed.com/remeepatel/relationships-in-your-head-vs-relationships-in-real-life

WHERE ELSE TO FIND ME:
YouTube ‣ http://www.youtube.com/lammy1294
Instagram ‣ http://www.instagram.com/_jessicaybl
Tumblr ‣ http://www.jessicaybl.tumblr.com
Twitter ‣ http://www.twitter.com/_jessicaybl

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